What results from a bad day, etc.

Christians annoy the crap out of me. Sunday morning is definetly the best part of my week. I love being with the youth in sunday school and singing good songs and listening and learning in the sermon and seeing a lot of people that I really just love all in one room. Today was not that kind of day. There are days that I walk into church and listen to the sermons and talk to all the smiling people and sing all the songs and I feel like every bit of it is fake. I feel like we've created some really annoying bubble that only a certain type of person can enter into, and we have all these words and phrases that we use that dont seem to match up anywhere. We just talk about things a lot. As I'm writing this I also want to add in that I hate books that talk about how much the American church is lacking today. I mean of course the church is lacking. It is a big room slam packed with sinners. So I don't want to be one of those kids. I am well pleased with my church in fact. I guess there's no real point to what I'm saying, I just want to say things because it's my blog and I can. We Christians try to figure everything out and we think we're right about everything and we take scripture out of context when it agrees with our point, and then again when it disproves the point someone else is trying to make and we don't like it. Christianity is not simple, and I'm not trying to make the point that it is. I just think that our little God bubble that we want to all be protected from the world in adds a lot of things to what it means to follow Christ. Lots of extra phrases and books and 10-step programs. YES I want to go into the field of business one day and NO I don't intend on going to hell for it. Money is not evil, the love of it is. So I'm over it and I dig Jesus.

I might go back and delete this post when I stop being emo for a day.

Just a Mid-day Assessment

I haven't decided (and please dont decide for me because it would affect my self-esteem) if my constant need to be in charge is a good or bad thing. Take my job for example. I have a boss. A boss who is way cool and she's been doing her job for 19 years. I am in fact the lowest on the food chain in the PRT department, and I think I'm good with authority figures and submitting to them. But sometimes I just think I would do things in a better and more efficient way. The reasons why I want to get my masters degree are several, and among those reasons is the fact that I want to be in charge one day. I want to be the manager, the boss. I figure if you are stuck in a job for the majority of your short life, you might as well be dang good at it, amen? Without doing a pointless amount of work, I really like to learn. And if I do something I want to learn ALL there is to know about that thing. I think that's my main reason for going back to school. Because I want to learn more, and be better at what I hope to do someday. Some call that a power trip. I call it wanting to do well in life. And when I one day own you and the Super Bowl champion Carolina Panthers, you'll say "dang. she was right."

I also don't like how many pretzels they put into cheez-it party mix. Hello if i wanted THAT many, I would have just bought a bag of pretzels.

Summer Lovin

As it turns out, I will probably have one of the most boring summers of my life this time around. But I've come up with an uncompleted list of fun to complete throughout the hot months so that it's not that way. You could come with me.

1. Paint my newly aquired rocking chair for the front porch of the new house. If you like to paint, help.
2. Learn how to make an Omelet.
3. Continue the "All of my friends are getting married" summer 2009 tour.
4. Learn the F chord.
5. Go for a run most afternoons.
6. Pick strawberries at the farm in Fort Mill. Then eat em.
7. Go back to Huntington for camping.
8. Spend a whole day at the beach surfing.
9. Start a tan. I'm way behind for it to be May already.
10. Take a random day off work and watch nothing but musicals all day.
11. Eat at the new chic-fil-a in Gaffney.
12. Midnight showing of the new Harry Potter.
13. Get mad creative and start writing my book.
14. Get better at golf, which will take up a good chunk of my time.
15. Go to a Knight's baseball game since I aint never been.

quote of the day

Gaffney Friends.

Laura: "I actually ate mexican for about every meal everyday, im excited about having our american mexican (broncos) tomorrow!"

Me: "Mexican every meal? thats what heaven will be!"

Laura: "And this was REAL mexican. like no white people worked there."

Come on friends get up now. Love is to be made.

Things ended today. But before you think I'm lame, I realize that I am actually lame for putting any sort of emotional thought into a tv show. Hey if you watched Grey's Anatomy, you too would feel the empty hole where your heart was prior to 9:00pm. It was the 2 part season finale and I cried after the first hour. After the second hour i was just too mad/shocked that they potentially killed off 2 of the best characters on the show. The last hour was about telling people that you love them and that you can't breathe without them while they are still here and they can hear you. As cheesey as it is, it's so true and it ripped my insides out so shutup.

The Pirates soccer season ended tonight which was close to being just as emotional. I had a really great group of kids this time around, and not because we won all but 3 games. I mean of course I liked that part. But they were all so cool and loved playing soccer and always wanted to learn. Getting to teach kids how to do the one thing that I LOVED growing up really is a joy to be able to do. I remember soccer being my outlet growing up and the thing that I really focused hard on and it taught me how to work hard and to be part of a team. So I'm glad I get to coach kids and hopefully put them on a similar path. I've found that I really like teaching people something that I'm passionate about. Not that I'm terribly good at it. Teaching is always a work in progress. But i really get a kick out of it. Pun intended i guess.

I was born to tell you I love you

I love it when scripture talks about nature doing things. Like in Psalm 98 that says, "Let the rivers clap their hands, let the mountains sing together for joy." I went camping with the youth group this weekend and we had a BIG time. We accidentally left most of the food in Rock Hill and I might have a semi-broken toe and the rain flooded our tent a little, but it was great being outside! I don't really get a big high from being out in nature and hanging out with spiders, I mean it's cool and all. But I do like getting away from everything. I'm a big star watcher when I get the opportunity. I read that on average, in 1 square inch of the Amazon jungle, there are 3,000 different species of trees. The average elm tree has 6 million leaves, and a caterpillar has 228 seperate and distinct muscles just in it's HEAD. I mean who makes that stuff up? I am definetly not that detailed. When I'm outside I like to look around and see just how detailed our Creator is and get a strong humbling feeling out of it. God created all of these things out in nature and all of these billions of galaxies and it's all to praise him. Oceans stop and start in a certain place to praise him, trees and plants grow and die to praise him, and he called it all GOOD for a reason. And here we are as humans, created for that very same thing. I'm usually reminded everytime I spend a good amount of time outside that maybe I was given life for the same purpose that all these other things were. To bring praise to the God who deserves it and that's all. I mean the God who created all these things is for some reason concerned with me. He was extremely detailed when He thought me up. hmmm.

quote of the day

I was looking through an old journal the other day and it was the one I had 2 summers ago at Rockfish. I found a quote from one of my 7 year old campers that I need to share. We were eating sour skittles.

"I used to hate sour things when I was younger, but now I just see it as a challenge."